First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I deserve to be covered in dicks
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
