I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize