Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
