Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Randomize
