it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
