hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
