My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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