Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
