he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
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