Banned from zoo.
Again?
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
