Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
