I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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