I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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