Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
