one might say we're banned from that church
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
