I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
