yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize