38 yer olds are good kisserssss
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
He did a backflip because drugs
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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