yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Randomize
