If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
