check it out our google latitudes are spooning
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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