He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
