There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
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