So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
