I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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