did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
