The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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