I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
