therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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