Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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