i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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