he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
