Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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