Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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