My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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