it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
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