I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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