that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
