That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Shame - the story of my life.
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