p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
