I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize