: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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