Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Randomize
