I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
