You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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