JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
