Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
