just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize