Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
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