so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
