Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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